Poor Unfortunate Souls
by SoraxLight
Summary: When it comes to dealing out cards, fighting can get a little boring. Larxene decides it's time for a change, but it's not exactly the brightest idea... (Warning: Contains strongly hinted Yaoi, don't like, don't read.)


**Poor Unfortunate Souls**

After hours of mindless walking, Sora began to wonder if he would ever find Riku or Namine. As he approached the next room, a booming voice caused him to jump out of his skin.

"The only way to get what you want is to become a human yourself!"

He looked around frantically. _What did she just say? Become a human? Get what he wants?_

"Err-" He said, looking at the figure who just spoke. It was a girl with blonde hair and bright green eyes. She smiled wide at him.

"Can you repeat that? Or-can you really do that?" Sora's stupidity of words caused him to knock himself on the head a few times.

Her grin became wider, and she walked closer to the brunette boy.

"My dear, sweet child. That's what I do. It's what I live for. To help unfortunate merfolk like yourself. Poor souls with no one else to turn to." She said, inching ever so close to Sora's face.

"Merfolk...?" He questioned. Sora looked to his feet, then back to Larxene, who seemed to have broken out into song. This didn't seem to be the typical "Take this card and get out of my face." approach.

Larxene ignored him and persisted on with her little tune."I admit that in the past I've been a nasty. They weren't kidding when they called me, well, a witch But you'll find that nowadays, I've mended all my ways. Repented, seen the light, and made a switch - to this."

The blonde gestured to her full frame. All Sora could really do was watch in aww (or confusion, whichever you prefer...).

"And I fortunately know a little magic, it's a talent that I always have possessed." She said, opening a random cauldron out of nowhere.

"And dear lady, please don't laugh, I use it on behalf of the miserable, the lonely, and depressed." She covered her mouth and added "Pathetic..."

She then raised up a hologram of two silhouettes.

"Poor unfortunate souls! In pain, in need..." She then pointed at the hologram of the girl. It was Namine!

"This one longing to be thinner," Her finger shifted to a blond boy with spiky hair "That one wants to get the girl. And do I help them? Yes, indeed."

She snapped her fingers and Namine fell into the blond's arms.

Sora opened his mouth to say something, (Although it was probably open and on the floor this whole time...) but he shut it as soon as Larxene went on.

"Those poor unfortunate souls. So sad, so true... They come flocking to my cauldron crying, 'Spells, Larxene, please!'. And I help them! Yes I do..."

Her eyes began to narrow on Sora, who became more and more confused as to what she was going on about.

" Now it's happened once or twice, someone couldn't pay the price." She gestured to the hologram of Namine and the other boy, who held on to each other desperately. "And I'm afraid I had to rake 'em 'cross the coals..."

Sora watched the couple shrink down into a depressing form.  
"Yes I've had the odd complaint. But on the whole I've been a saint." She did a pose and looked to the sky (or perhaps the roof...) "To those poor unfortunate souls!"

She ran up to Sora and grabbed him tightly by the shoulders. "Now, here's the deal, I will make you a potion that will turn you into a human for three days. Got that? THREE days. Now listen, this is important. Before the sun sets on the third day, you've got to get dear old Riku to fall in love with you. That is, he's got to kiss you. Not just any kiss... The kiss of _true love_."

Sora stared into her emerald eyes. How in Castle Oblivion did she know about his secret love with Riku?

"If he does kiss you before the sun sets on the third day, you'll remain human permanently! But, if he doesn't..." She gestured to the hologram.

"You turn back into a mermaid and you belong to me." She grinned.

"No, Sora!" Donald quacked from behind a corner, but he was instantly shut up when Larxene chucked a knife at his beak.

The blonde grabbed Sora by the chin. "Have we got a deal?"

"...What has Organization XIII come to?" Asked Sora, raising an eyebrow.

Larxene's eyes narrowed. "Just answer the question."

Sora began to ponder. The less he tried to think about the situation, the more it made sense. Although he felt this has happened somewhere else...

"If I become 'human', then I'll never be with Kairi and the others again..." He said slowly.

"Oh! And there is one more thing." Said Larxene, bringing her hand to her chin. "We haven't discussed the subject of payment! You can't get something for nothing, you know..."

"But I don't have any-" Sora was cut off abruptly when Larxene pressed her hand over his mouth.

"I'm not asking much, just a token, really, a trifle! You'll never even miss it. What I want from you is - your voice."

"My...my voice?"

"You've got it sweet-cakes, no more talking, singing, zip!"

"But without my voice, how can I-"

"You'll have your looks, your pretty face. And don't underestimate the importance of BODY LANGUAGE – HA!" She gestured, swaying her hips.

"The men up there don't like a lot of blabber, they think a girl who gossips is a bore! Yet on land it's much preferred for ladies not to say a word. And after all dear, what is idle babble for? Come on, they're not all that impressed with conversation, true gentlemen avoid it when they can. But they dote and swoon and fawn on a lady who's withdrawn. It's she who holds her tongue who get's a man."

Sora's eye twitched every time he was called a lady. He really wish she would stop so he could get to the next floor. But the idea of Riku falling for him sounded so promising...

"Come on you poor unfortunate soul! Go ahead! Make your choice! I'm a very busy woman and I haven't got all day. It won't cost much," A hologram of Riku appeared in front of the brunette. He was comforted a bit by his smile. "just your voice!" Sora jumped as Larxene appeared in front of Riku.

"You poor unfortunate soul! It's sad, but true..."

"If you want to cross the bridge, my sweet, you've got the pay the toll. Take a gulp and take a breath, and go ahead and sign the scroll!" Larxene handed Sora a scroll and began to mumble to herself.  
"Axel, Marluxia, now I've got her, boys! The boss is on a roll, this poor unfortunate soul!"

Sora couldn't help but sign with hesitation, and his name lay there in ink. He didn't know what he was doing, all he knew was that he had made one of the most important decisions of his life. And the mood was offsetting with all of this singing...

"Beluga sevruga. Come winds of the Caspian Sea. Larengix glaucitis. Et max laryngitis. La voce to me!"

Colors from the potion began to swirl around the room, making it hard to see anything but the blonde witch.

"Now, sing..."

First of all, Sora really didn't know how to sing, especially when put on the spot. He contemplated singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star, but that would have probably made the situation worse that need be.

Larxene leaned in a bit and said quietly "Just say ahh in a musical tone..."

She really didn't look amused, but the idea worked for Sora. As he began to sing, the most girly voice came out. Though this didn't seem to bother Larxene. At all. Which disturbed Sora, seeing as he had more of a singing voice than Kairi...

"Keep singing!"

Sora rolled his eyes a bit. He felt a bit embarrassed. Was this a prank pulled by one of the Organization members to reveal a girly side of him? If it was, he would probably have to beat the snot out of every single last one of them.

He could just hear laughter in the back of his mind already, but, the bright side was that he used to have an amazing voice until today...

He watched as his voice reflected in a tiny ball, that entered Larxene's necklace.

Sora began to glow, although his appearance didn't change much, he felt different. And a new card had slipped into his hand.

Larxene laughed maliciously as Donald and Goofy escorted Sora out of the room.

-A few minutes later-

"The Little Mermaid? Are you serious, Larxene?" Asked Axel in an unamused tone.

"Well, things got boring. I had to try something new..." She said with a wave of her hand.

"And where did you get the munny for a cauldron?" Marluxia asked, examining the pot in the middle of the room.

"I just got it off of Vexen when he wasn't looking." She responded casually.

"No, really. Aren't you supposed to just fight him?" Axel persisted.

"Can we not discuss this?" Asked Larxene.

"Well, I thought Sora had a beautiful voice." Marluxia said dreamily.

"Why am I stuck with these people?" Axel mumbled, pinching the bridge of his nose.

And to this day, we will never know why Larxene decided to go with The Little Mermaid for handing out a card. Or how she knew that Sora liked Riku.

All we know is that Axel really hates his job...

_Author's Note: I really don't know what to say about this... I was watching The Little Mermaid and drinking coffee, which I shouldn't be allowed to do anymore. But, I hope you all enjoy this musical thingy! xD_


End file.
